Death Note's Adventure Time
by keehl86-jeevas87
Summary: Lumpy Space Princess comes into the Death Note world and tells Mello, Matt and L that they're the chosen ones who need to complete a dangerous quest in the Adventure Time world. Mello, Matt and L laugh at her so she takes them there by force. R&R.
1. A Random Break In

**We are not the owners of Death Note or Adventure Time, or any of their characters. We just own the story. Other things used in this story are: the computer game Solitaire, one mentioning of Twilight and Harry Potter, and a quote from the movie National Treasure. None of these belong to us either. Anyway, enjoy the randomness of our little parody. ;)**

DEATH NOTE'S ADVENTURE TIME

By: Brett & Johnny Wolff

CHAPTER ONE – A Random Break-In

Matt, Mello and L are at Matt's house. Mello's on the computer playing Solitaire, L is laying upside down on the couch with his head hanging off the edge of the couch reading a book, and Matt's sitting on the other couch watching TV.

Then out of nowhere a purple lumpy blob with a face and a star on its forehead comes out of a portal in the wall and floats into the living room. Mello stares at it in disgust.

"Ughh, sick! What the hell is that!"

Lumpy Space Princess floats up to Mello and punches him in the face.

"Don't be such a lumping jerk! I have feelings!"

"Whoa. He just talked..." Matt remarks.

"I'm not a guy! The name's Lumpy Space Princess. I'm a GIRL!"

Mello grabs her by the throat and chokes her, then throws her across the room.

"Ahh! What the lump is your problem!"

"NEVER punch me in the face! You're lucky I don't have my gun on me or I'd shoot you right now!"

"And if you're a chick then why do you have the voice of a dude?" Matt asks.

"Maybe she's gay." L suggests.

"What? NO I'M NOT! My voice naturally sounds like this!"

"Uh huh." Matt says sarcastically.

"You're gay." L adds.

"Shut the lump up! I am not!"

"Psh. Yeah you are." Mello laughs.

"I AM NOT!"

"Why are you even here?" Matt asks.

"Because. In my world we need help on a dangerous quest, and I was told to enter that portal into your world and take you back with me. You're the chosen ones."

L raises an eyebrow.

"Say what?"

"Ha." Matt laughs. "That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard."

"The 'chosen ones'? Psh. Ha ha!" Mello cracks up.

"UGHH! You guys are jerks!"

Mello smirks.

"Fuck yeah. It's a proud title I live by."

Lumpy Space Princess grunts.

"That's it."

She grabs Mello by the shirt and pushes him into the portal, and does the same to Matt and L. Then she goes in after them.


	2. A Stupid Quest

CHAPTER TWO – A Stupid Quest

A portal opens up in the Adventure Time world and Lumpy Space Princess floats out followed by Mello, Matt and L who fall out and hit the ground, then the portal closes behind them. When Mello, Matt and L get back up on their feet again Mello growls.

"What the hell man!"

"Do you jerks believe me now?"

"Take us back NOW."

"Not until you complete this quest."

"Ughh!"

"What is the quest?" L asks.

"Your quest is to find your way back home again."

"..."

Matt puts his face in his hand.

"WHAT!" Mello grabs her by the throat. "Are you fucking serious! You purposely brought us here _just_ to make us find our way back again?"

"Yep."

Mello growls and tightens his grip around her throat and starts choking her, then L grabs his arm.

"Whoa whoa, hey. There's no need for violence. Put him down."

Mello slams Lumpy Space Princess into the ground.

"I am not a GUY!"

Mello stomps her into the dirt with his foot.

"Shut up!"

"Just tell us how to get back. There's no way in hell I'm gonna figure it out. I'm so not in the mood." Matt says, annoyed.

Lumpy Space Princess weakly gets back up after being trampled on and brushes the dirt off her face. She points to a distant cave.

"You see that cave over there? Go into it. If you can make it all the way through to the end of the cave and complete all the trials, a portal will open for you that will take you back to your world."

"Wait. What do you mean by _trials_?" Mello asks.

"That's all you get. You're on your own."

Lumpy Space Princess snaps her fingers and disappears into thin air.

"Ughh, fucking hell!" Mello growls.

Matt sighs.

"Come on. Let's just get the hell out of here."

Matt starts walking toward the cave, and L and Mello follow him. Mello huffs.

"I should've killed that fag."

"You can kill him if he shows up again."


	3. The Stupid Quest Starts

CHAPTER THREE - The Stupid Quest Starts

Mello, Matt and L get to the cave and peer inside. The cave seems to go on and on, and they can't see the back of it.

"Whoa. This cave is huge." Matt says.

They back up when they see a big dirty bubble coming toward them from out of the cave. The bubble pops, and Finn and Jake are standing where the bubble was. Finn and Jake look at them.

"Hey. Who are you guys?"

"It doesn't matter who we are." L says.

"What's with the hat?" Mello laughs.

Finn shrugs.

"I don't like my hair, so I wear this over it."

"Dude that hat is so stupid."

"Hey. Watch it." Jake snaps.

"Feh. Whatever." Mello huffs. "Who the hell are you?"

"I'm Finn, and this is my dog Jake. You guys aren't from here, are you?"

"Does it look like we're from here?" L rolls his eyes.

"Well jeez, I was just asking."

"We're from another world." Matt says.

"We were abducted by a purple blob douche bag and taken to this world through some portal." Mello adds.

"Hm. Well you guys aren't the only ones. It's happened before." Jake pipes in. "Anyone who comes here from another world has to come to this cave to go back. This is called the Cave of Portals, and in order for a portal back to your world to appear you have to complete all the trials in the cave."

"How many trials are there?" L asks.

"Ten."

"What are they?"

"The trials are different every time, so we don't really know. But we can guide you through."

"Thanks, but we don't need a guide." Matt says.

"Well we're gonna come anyway cause we have nothing else to do."

Matt rolls his eyes.

"Fine. Whatever."

Matt, Mello, L, Finn and Jake all go into the cave and walk for a bit until they run into a really dorky-looking skeleton.

"Hey. My name's Tommy."

"We don't care." Mello says in a monotone voice.

"Hey! You're one of those skeleton guys who tried to kill us and eat our flesh in the land of the dead!" Finn exclaims.

"Dude! He is!" Jake shouts.

Finn and Jake start making different ninja poses, and after a while Tommy gets annoyed.

"Please stop that. It's annoying."

Finn and Jake keep making poses slower and slower, then stop.

"Just tell us what this trial is." Mello says.

"Say please and I will."

Mello glares at him with his evil glare.

"Fine. For your first trial, you must pass through this ax pendulum."

"What ax pendulum..."

Tommy points up at the roof of the cave where a small 3-foot long plastic toy ax is swinging back and forth.

"Are you fucking serious."

"Ughh." Matt rolls his eyes.

He walks under it and continues, and the others follow him. Then King Xergiok, that evil goblin king who spanked all his subjects for fun, pops up out of nowhere and bends Tommy over his knee and spanks him while laughing evily.

Next they run into Lumpy Space Princess, who decided to show up again.

"Great. It's that purple guy again." Mello groans.

"Ughh! For the last lumping time I am NOT a GUY!"

"Yeah, whatever."

Matt rolls his eyes.

"So what's _your_ trial?"

"Your next test is to cross this river of quicksand."

Matt glances past her, and a few feet behind her is a thin stream of quicksand. He points to it.

"You mean that?"

"YES. Do you see any other one laying around?"

"Dude, that thing is only like two feet across."

"Hey, I don't make the trials here."

King Xergiok pops up again and laughs evily while spanking Lumpy Space Princess and disappears again.

"Hey! What the junk, man!"

Mello laughs and punches her in the face and Matt kicks her in the face when she hits the ground.

"Fag." They say simultaniously.

Finn and Jake look at each other.

"Well, dang."

They all step over the two-foot wide quicksand stream and continue to the next trial, where they meet the Ice King.

"Ice King!" Finn shouts. "What are you doing here?"

"Oh, nothing really. Looking for ways to be annoying. The usual."

"Ughh. You make me sick."

"Yeah yeah, whatever. Now in order to pass this trial one of you has to beat me in a staring contest. Who wants to volunteer?"

Mello steps up.

"I will."

When the Ice King begins to stare at Mello to start the competition, instead of staring back Mello stabs the Ice King in the eyes and the Ice King screams. The gang proceeds and Finn and Jake laugh.

"Ha ha. Nice." Finn says.

King Xergiok comes in again and laughs while spanking the Ice King and disappears again.

Next they come across Peppermint Butler.

"Hey. I'm your fourth trial."

"Yeah yeah. Just cut to the chase." L says.

"You must play 20 Questions with me in order to pass."

"Ughh. FINE." Matt groans.

"Alright then. Question 1: What color is my underwear?"

"How the hell are we supposed to know that?"

"Question 2: What does the tattoo on my butt look like?"

"What..."

"Question 3: Why is the sky blue?"

"Doesn't it matter if we say the wrong answer?" Mello asks.

"I guess he just accepts whatever he hears." Matt says with a shrug.

"Ok then..."

"Question 4: Would you die if you fell off a 200-foot cliff?"

"Probably." L says.

"Question 5: Why does the Twilight series suck?"

"Because Harry Potter is better." Matt says.

"Ughh. This is really getting annoying." Mello groans.

"I'm on it." L remarks.

L goes up to Peppermint Butler and takes a bite out of him, and while he starts screaming they all walk past him and keep going. Then King Xergiok appears again and spanks Peppermint Butler and laughs, then disappears.

Mello sees Near off in the distance.

"Near...? What are _you_ doing here?"

"I found a jar of cookies and it lead me here."

"..."

Near walks away and disappears, and a gnome knight is standing where Near used to be.

"I'm you're next trial. Now complete this Connect the Dots Puzzle."

L puts his thumb against the base of his lip, then takes the marker from the gnome knight and connects four dots, making a square.

"Seriously? A _square_." Mello says.

Matt rolls his eyes.

"This world is stupid."

The gang continues again, then King Xergiok comes out again and spanks the gnome knight and disappears.

Next they run into Starchy.

"Solve this riddle:

The legend writ  
>The stain affected<br>The key in silence  
>undetected<br>55 in iron pen  
>Mr. Mattlack can't offend."<p>

"Hmm... I swear to god I've heard this somewhere before." Matt says.

Mello raises an eyebrow.

"I think it was in the movie National Treasure."

"Oh yeah."

"What is the answer?" Starchy says.

"There's an invisible map on the back of the Declaration of Independence." Matt says.

"Correct. You may continue."

They go on to the next trial, and King Xergiok pops up again and spanks Starchy.

The Death Note gang and Finn and Jake walk for quite a bit but can't find anyone.

"Umm... so..." Mello shrugs.

Finally a naked guy starts running in circles around them.

"I'm naked! Eee hee hee!"

Mello puts his face in his hand and refuses to look.

"Oh my god."

Matt turns red in the face.

"Dude, _please_ tell me we don't have to catch that guy."

"Try and catch me if you want to proceed! Eeh hee hee!"

"Fuck!"

L sticks his leg out and trips the naked guy when he comes close enough.

"There. I got him."

They all move on again, and King Xergiok comes out again and almost spanks the naked guy but stops when he sees he's naked.

"Ughh, sick."

So he kicks the naked guy instead then runs off.

After walking another while with no signs of anything else the gang runs into Brett and Johnny.

"Sup." Brett says. "This is your last trial."

"But this is only our 8th trial..." L looks at Jake. "I thought you said there were ten trials."

"I'm not very good at counting. Heh heh."

L rolls his eyes.

"Sorry about that." Finn says. "Anyway, since this is your last trial you can continue by yourselves. We're gonna go look for something else to do."

Finn and Jake leave.

"Ok." Johnny says. "Solve this math problem as your last test, then a portal back to your world will appear and you can all go home."

"What's 2+2?" Brett asks.

"Four." Mello answers.

"Alright. You guys can go back home now."

Brett steps to the side to reveal a portal, which L Mello and Matt then go into, and they're finally teleported back home.

_Later..._

The naked guy warps into Light Yagami's bedroom out of nowhere for no particular reason and starts running in circles around Light.

"I'm naked! Eee hee hee!"

Light rolls his eyes.

"Sinner."

He pulls out his death note, and then King Xergiok pops up in Light's room and kicks the death note out of Light's hand, then bends Light over his knee and starts spanking him and laughing evilly. King Xergiok stops and looks at Ryuk, who is watching with a 'wth' expression.

"Hey. What's up."

He continues spanking Light and laughing, and Ryuk just sits there.

"..."

THE END


End file.
